just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Shame is for Republicans.
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