Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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