I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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