That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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