I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
