And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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