Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
