David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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