She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
