She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
