Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
