dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
