More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
and you fell through a lawn chair
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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