Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Randomize
