i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Randomize
