i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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