We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Randomize