You can't motorboat a personality
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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