I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Randomize
