Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
