I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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