Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
