I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize