I just found a bag of teeth...
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
