It's just like the Real World with babies
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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