come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
