the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize