How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
