you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
