You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
