I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
We got so high we made milksteak
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
