My cat gives me a boner
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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