return my video game
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize