Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
