I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Randomize
