This girl is more easily done than said...
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
