at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize