You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
