There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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