As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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