The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
