hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
