Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
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