She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I need water and some morals
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
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