I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Terrible idea I love it
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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