ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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