Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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