Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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