I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
