what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Randomize
