Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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