i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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