i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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